Iman

When things get overwhelming and you started to become less kind, less patient and have more dzon to either your Maker or to the people around you, check your iman, nana.

Have you been distant from the Quran?

Have you been making less doa?

Have you been stuffing your own ego?

A close friend has once told me, if you started to be not so close to a friend previously dear to you, maybe one of you is having iman issue. As in, different iman levels can affect chemistry.

Iman. A big thing it sure is. 

Update:
Just a found a verse on Iman and the love in our heart.

"Sesungguhnya orang yang beriman dan beramal soleh, kelak Allah Yang Maha Pemurah akan menanamkan dalam (hati) mereka rasa kasih sayang."

Small, little things

In a relationship, small little gestures on random days bring so much happiness.

As simple as that person spreads sajadah for you.
As simple as that person places a pillow under your head as you fell asleep in the car,
As simple as that person calls/texts you to let you know that he/she is coming home soon.
As simple as that person cares about your family members,
As simple as that person asks how your day has been or say thank you.
As simple as many other things I treasure too much to mention,
Really, thank you.


Forever, I am grateful.
For those "simple" things are big and meant alot.

Many times, I thought of them and couldn't help but to feel "Baiknya Allah bagi semua ni"

Hope

Hope is a nurtured thing.
You see a lady conceiving for 9 months, hoping to see her baby at the end. For 9 months, hope is nurtured. Tummy gets bigger. Movements get increasingly felt. All seem to be telling the mother to be more hopeful day by day.

Hope is a gift. From someone to another. When one promised another of a delightful prospect. Of some forms of happiness. But What happens when you are too scared of your own weaknesses, fearing that you may give false hope? Or could it be that you are avoiding your own chance to giving your own best as you avoid making any promise at all?

Funny is this thing called hope. It makes you happy even at it's sheer utterance despite us knowing that future is something beyond our control. Perhaps, c'iest la vie.. that's how life is. You give some hopes to others and you receive hope and be hopeful. You try your ultimate best at keeping your own promise.

Perhaps hope is always a two-way thing. A balance between giving promises and setting expectations. About putting efforts and having tawakal to Allah.

Perhaps hope is about collaboration. Maybe it needs all entities to share the same aspirations, rather than just one or some entities being hopeful and later cry alone at disappointment.

And indeed He has claimed. one thing to hold to and confide in is,

Allah paling menepati janji.
Dia tak menzalimi hamba-hambaNya .

Kenangan

Ada apa pada kenangan?
Andai disebut, apa diratap.
Ada apa pada sayangan,
Andai diangkut, entah ditatap.

Once a stream

If my tarbiyah is a small river

I wonder what colour it is now,

left stagnant blocked, untouched,

leaving chance for the blowing ashes.

I wonder what state it is now,

Is it cold uninviting,

Or rather now an inkling to different sorts of invitees.

Maybe this is a help.

Maybe this is a test.

For how long, love?

********************

Al-Aswad lbn Hilal reported: As we were walking with Mu’adh bin Jabal one day, he said, 

‘Let us sit down for a while to meditate on Allah.’

I miss having friends to sit down and talk about Allah.

Maybe Allah wants me to correct my niyah.

Maybe Allah wants me to practise what I have learned before.

Maybe Allah wants me to work extra hard to remember him and and continue finding my own usrah.

There are other ways of remembering Him, I know.

but I guess I'm just too scared that I'm not strong enough.
Please make doa for me.

Maybe I should try to practise the doa' taught by Rasulullah SAW to Muadz:

‘O Allah help me in remembering You, in offering thanks to You, and in worshiping You properly.”

Ps: I am much thankful that Allah blessed me with a lifetime naqib though. Despite my other half's busy housemanship, Alhamdulillah he's there to be my Naqib cum usrahmate. Jazakallahukhayr my dearest. 

Nieces

It's sweetness having to see a lovely girl and a cute baby girl as you return from work.
My new nieces, Naurah and Nailah are just so adorable.

May both of you grow to be solehah, and great loving daugthers to your parents. and great nieces to cik Nana please!

________________________________________

I'm looking for my grit.
Soon.
Soon.

Orientation weeks have ended.
Things are stable and pleasant subhanallah.
It's time for empowerment.

My other half is now working in Hosp Sg Buloh alhamdulillah. And I've just graduated few weeks back. Sooo many good things to be grateful for! Alhamdulillah. doakan keberkatan Allah buat kami!

The track

I stood there watching as fathers, mothers, children, brothers, sisters, and others to others entered the train. The train from Abberswyth to Birmingham. Busy souls with myriads of goals and destinations. With different emotions and different sort of things going on in their lives.

I trailed my gaze along the rail  track till the steel seemed to disappear into the bushes where it bends.

"Do know, Nana,
What's straight on, isn't without bend.
But as long as you have your track, you'll get to where you should be."

Alhamdulillah.
Life has been so blessed with goodness,
Now shared,
With a gentle soul with a big heart.

Allahu,
May our marriage be a source of happiness
And most importantly a source of what needed to keep on the track despite the bends.
From You and to You.
Bismillah.

Please pray for us that our marriage be blessed with sakina, mawaddah, and rahmah

S's N

...

Sayup talu tapak menyapa
Taman rapi tempat menjadi
Kuncup semalu saat disapa
Bukan sepi tiada sudi.

Dingin sedang bayu merembat,
Embun sedang persis berkantung,
Jernih kadang tak terlihat,
Kasih sering tak terhitung.

Vending machine

Almost is a prod,
Or rather a sword.

Almost is a hope,
Or perhaps a slope.

Almost is what it is.
When you wished
Yet it withered when it's either
Not Nil a coin
Not Broken of the machine
But Press the wrong button
Hence wrong what hits the bin.

Almost.
Yet all the steps are wishes come true
So it's fine
I thank you.

--------------

Tawakul - Trust Allah A Powerful Story - Ahmed Jibril

Whoever put trust in Allah,

He will suffice him.

Fitness videos channel

Check Lumowell for their fitness videos.

Highly recommended!

Ps: Sejak final year rasa betul diri tak fit. Rindu zaman netball and cycling. Basikal dah takde. Sobs. Netball gang pun takde. Nah alasan kamu ==.== 

Fuels

Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:

He who alleviates the suffering of a brother out of the sufferings of the world, Allah would alleviate his suffering from the sufferings of the Day of Resurrection, and he who finds relief for one who is hard-pressed, Allah would make things easy for him in the Hereafter, and he who conceals (the faults) of a Muslim, Allah would conceal his faults in the world and in the Hereafter. Allah is at the back of a servant so long as the servant is at the back of his brother, and he who treads the path in search of knowledge, Allah would make that path easy, leading to Paradise for him and those persons who assemble in the house among the houses of Allah (mosques) and recite the Book of Allah and they learn and teach the Qur'an (among themselves) there would descend upon them tranquility and mercy would cover them and the angels would surround them and Allah mentions them in the presence of those near Him, and he who is slow-paced in doing good deeds, his (high) lineage does not make him go ahead

This.Very much needed.

Obstetrics

A day of finishing an obstetrics textbook is an amazing day.
Sekarang boleh cakap amazing, tadi waktu baca macam I was like "Oh god, oh god please please bila nak habis"
Nah, I'm not complaining :p

Obstetrics is really interesting actually. It's one of those field where you, as doctors, by default are not treating diseases but supervising one of the amazing natural life processes. And manage when needed. Cool ey.

Learning obstetrics makes me realise how delicate our birth process is. 
How the position and turns of the baby's head and body matters alot.
How baby kicks is the fetal's way of saying "hey mummy, I'm doing great here"
How and where the placenta attached can make all the difference
How a mum positioning herself can change things.

Learning what happens to the seed in the tummy is really amazing. Subhanallah. and have you ever thought of this- We actually began our life dalam air tau ;) 
Also
Learning how things can go very wrong makes me realise how giving birth is a process that needs huge size of tawakkal and doa. 
But The whole process is just so beautiful.
And my admiration to obstetricians simply grow. It's a risky and difficult job, yet so so noble. May Allah repay you all abundantly.

And it just makes me think of how much our mums have gone through throughout their pregnancy and delivery- and those are just the beginning to their sacrifices in dealing with us! Sayang ma!

Here is my mid revision break video. Tengok video made by Natalie:) She's having a girl this time!

Pantai

Kalau takut dilambung ombak,
Jangan berumah di tepi pantai.

World

Such a pretty web,
Delicate with patterns.
Ze the ladder,
Ze the home,
Ze the treasure.

Such a dear web
Made way for the ray,
Had turns with the wind,
yet stay.

Yet such is a web.
when strong is a lie
what deemed as the wind,
is a hint,
what deemed as the ray,
is the shine of the gray.

Hadith 29: Kunci-kunci syurga

Hadits ke-29

Kunci-kunci Surga

عَن مُعَاذ بن جَبَلٍ رضي الله عنه قَالَ: قُلتُ يَا رَسُولَ الله أَخبِرنِي بِعَمَلٍ يُدخِلُني الجَنَّةَ وَيُبَاعدني منٍ النار قَالَ: (لَقَدْ سَأَلْتَ عَنْ عَظِيْمٍ وَإِنَّهُ لَيَسِيْرٌ عَلَى مَنْ يَسَّرَهُ اللهُ تَعَالَى عَلَيْهِ: تَعْبُدُ اللهَ لاَتُشْرِكُ بِهِ شَيْئَا، وَتُقِيْمُ الصَّلاة، وَتُؤتِي الزَّكَاة، وَتَصُومُ رَمَضَانَ، وَتَحُجُّ البَيْتَ. ثُمَّ قَالَ: أَلاَ أَدُلُّكَ عَلَى أَبْوَابِ الخَيرِ: الصَّومُ جُنَّةٌ، وَالصَّدَقَةُ تُطْفِئُ الخَطِيئَةَ كَمَا يُطْفِئُ الـمَاءُ النَّارَ، وَصَلاةُ الرَّجُلِ فِي جَوفِ اللَّيْلِ ثُمَّ تَلا : (تَتَجَافَى جُنُوبُهُمْ عَنِ الْمَضَاجِعِ) حَتَّى بَلَغَ: (يَعْلَمُون) [السجدة : ١٧-١٦] ثُمَّ قَالَ: أَلا أُخْبِرُكَ بِرَأْسِ الأَمْرِ وَعَمُودِهِ وَذِرْوَةِ سَنَامِهِ ؟ قُلْتُ: بَلَى يَارَسُولَ اللهِ، قَالَ: رَأْسُ الأَمْرِ الإِسْلامُ وَعَمُودُهُ الصَّلاةُ و ذروَةُ سَنَامِهِ الجِهَادُ ثُمَّ قَالَ: أَلا أُخبِرُكَ بِملاكِ ذَلِكَ كُلِّهِ؟ قُلْتُ:بَلَى يَارَسُولَ اللهِ. فَأَخَذَ بِلِسَانِهِ وَقَالَ: كُفَّ عَلَيْكَ هَذَا. قُلْتُ يَانَبِيَّ اللهِ وَإِنَّا لَمُؤَاخَذُونَ بِمَا نَتَكَلَّمُ بِهِ ؟ فَقَالَ: ثَكِلَتْكَ أُمُّكَ يَامُعَاذُ. وَهَل يَكُبُّ النَّاسَ فِي النَّارِ عَلَى وُجُوهِهِم أَو قَالَ: عَلَى مَنَاخِرِهِم إِلاَّ حَصَائِدُ أَلسِنَتِهِم) رواه والتِّرمِذِي وقال: حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ صَحِيحٌ

Indonesia

Dari Muadz bin Jabal radhiyallahu anhu, dia berkata, Wahai Rasulullah, beritahukan saya tentang perbuatan yang dapat memasukkan saya ke dalam surga dan menjauhkan saya dari neraka. Beliau shallallahu alaihi wa sallam bersabda, Engkau telah bertanya tentang sesuatu yang besar, namun itu ringan bagi mereka yang dimudahkan Allah Taala, (Amal itu adalah): beribadah kepada Allah dan tidak menyekutukannya dengan sesuatu apa pun, menegakkan shalat, menunaikan zakat, puasa ramadan dan pergi haji. Kemudian beliau berkata, Maukah aku beritahu pintu-pintu kebaikan? Puasa adalah tameng, sedekah akan mematikan (menghapus) kesalahan sebagaimana air mematikan api, dan shalatnya seseorang di tengah malam. Kemudian beliau membaca ayat (yang artinya). Lambung mereka jauh dari tempat tidurnya, mereka beribadah kepada Rabbnya dengan penuh rasa takut dan penuh harap, dan mereka menyedekahkan sebagian rezeki yang Kami berikan. Tiada satu pun jiwa yang mengetahui nikmat penyejuk hati yang disembunyikan sebagai balasan atas amal yang telah mereka lakukan. (QS. As-Sajdah: 16-17). Kemudian beliau bersabda, Maukah aku beritahu pokok dari segala perkara, tiangnya dan puncaknya? Aku menjawab, Tentu, wahai Nabi Allah. Beliau bersabda, Pokok perkara adalah Islam, tiangnya adalah shalat, dan puncaknya adalah jihad. Kemudian beliau bertanya, Maukah aku beritahu sesuatu (yang jika kalian laksanakan) maka kalian dapat memiliki semua itu? Saya berkata, Tentu, wahai Rasulullah. Maka Rasulullah memegang lisannya lalu bersabda, Jagalah ini. Saya berkata, Wahai Nabi Allah, apakah kita akan dihukum juga atas apa yang kita bicarakan? Beliau bersabda, Bagaimana kamu ini! Bukankah seseorang tersungkur ke dalam neraka disebabkan buah ucapan lisan-lisan mereka? (Riwayat at-Turmudzi, dan dia berkata, Haditsnya hasan shahih.)

-Hadith 40 Imam Nawawi

Maher Zain - One (2016) - Full Album (International Version)

Sejati (Official Music Video) - Faizal Tahir

The journey

Learn the blocks, not just the building.

Study the prototype, then derivatives.

Understand molecules.

Understand basic physiology.

Understand mechanism of actions.

Understand the whys of the whats

There is no good short cut to being a pro.

You learn the basics and fundamental of things

Then you shall grow full rather than hollow.

Being a tolibun ilm takes time.

Being an expert takes time.

To produce a good amal takes great time to learn great ilm.

Be sincere,

Be patient,

You'll get there.

You're not becoming an instant pro.

You'll embark the journey, girl,

With discipline, and with great effort,

and with great doa and tawakkal.

Take it easy

Just remind yourself,
good things take time
:)